Prioblem with ableism and labeling in this community

[xgui4]

I did do a pull request #302 to make the readme better and with better inclusivity but i got a lot of insensitive and even ablesit comment or word like "neurotic" and some have even accused me of being a "leftist troll" for no good reason other than that i use the word "ableist" for explaining my fear and concern about discrimination of marginised people or disabled like neurodivergeant people like myself.

[kkmzero]

Yes, it was me. What's up? You are creating all this mess just because there's a push-back for you sending in one PR after another desperately trying to get word "neurodivergent" into README? Damn dude and I thought I had problems 😆

[xgui4]

thank you for being a exemple ! and no it is not due to the push back, it is due to the insult such as "neurotic" or "cringe" and even labeling such as "leftist troll" ... i didn't even talk about my politic ideology and you label me ...

[kkmzero]

i didn't even talk about my politic ideology and you label me ...

Who...?

[xgui4]

a lot of you ? like they label me like i was a leftist/woke troll that want to destroy the project when it is not true

[kkmzero]

... Cares!

[xgui4]

???

[alexislefebvre]

1. You already received some answers here: [Documentation] Change the Readme.md to reflect the mission statement better (Issue #68) xserver#302 (comment)

   you were told once to stop with this nonsense

   and here: [Documentation] Change the Readme.md to reflect the mission statement better (Issue #68) xserver#302 (comment)

   This is the third time you've tried to do this, and the second time you've tried to do it directly. It doesn't improve the code in a meaningful way, it just tries to bend the README to pander to your specific identity. Just stop.

   Why do you keep trying to add "neurodivergeant" in the README after this idea was rejected several times? You're taking the risk of being banned from this whole project. You could simply continue to contribute, no one is stopping you, whatever you see in the README. Or, if you can't contribute because you don't like the README, then move on and contribute elsewhere. For your own sake, please stop mentioning "neurodivergeant" in every post, people are already fed up with it, you may face more anger if you continue to do it.

2. What is the goal of this discussion? What are you expecting? That wasn't cool to call you with different names, but no rule on this GitHub organization disallow that. Would you like that a code of conduct ask everyone to be nice with each other?

(disclaimer: I do not endorse this project (including its README) or its owner, I'm just trying to help someone who look lost)

[xgui4]

I had a look at Ableism - Wikipedia:

Ableism characterizes people as they are defined by their disabilities and it also classifies disabled people as people who are inferior to non-disabled people.

Who does this in this project?

dont use wikipedia as source to destroy argument, i use ableist cause neurophobe doesnt exist .... the exemple are the [hard r word], neurotic and even try to dismiss accomodation or exclude people or treat badly people who are neurodivergent or have a disablity.

here is the definition of chatgpt of ableisn :
I want to clarify something important: I'm not accusing anyone here of intentionally saying that disabled people are “inferior.” That's a very narrow definition of ableism.

Ableism also includes more subtle forms of exclusion, like using harmful language (such as the [R-word] or calling people “neurotic”), dismissing people's access needs, or minimizing concerns from neurodivergent or disabled contributors.

I used the word “ableism” because that’s the most accurate and recognized term — there isn’t a separate word like “neurophobia,” and I’m trying to describe real harm that happens when people like me are mocked, excluded, or not taken seriously.

My goal isn’t to create conflict — it’s to help make this space safe and respectful for everyone, especially people who are often overlooked in tech communities. That’s why I suggested a simple code of respect, to prevent things like this from happening again.

[xgui4]

I am serious with my question and a 👎 is not an appropriate answer in my eyes.

Are you interested in a solution?

yes, i will love a solution

[callmetango]

Ok, again my question: Who uses any harmful language or else of the above in this project?

[xgui4]

in the X11Libre/xserver#302 there is a lot of exemple and also maybe my old first pr of the readme

[callmetango]

Thank you, I will have a look at it.

[xgui4]

I am not disruptive, i just want a safe place for everyone (including you and me), but with a more inclusive way than just "all are welcome".

[Ryu945]

Trying to include everything can have the opposite effect. The point of the text is to show it is for everyone. Listing abosolutely everyone can give the feeling of group based politics is involved and that has an extremely negative connotation as group based politics is usually used to exclude people. Listing a very few extreme examples gets the message across and doesn't give the group based politics vibe.

[xgui4]

i am not a leftist

[johnlettman]

We're going to be stating the same obvious problem until we're blue in the face.

They want a callout for themselves, specifically, regardless of interpretation or consequences, and many people have been at this for a while.

They seem to ignore it and give thumbs down to anyone with an articulate reason why catering to their desire to inject the language is unreasonable.

It's just going in circles.

[xgui4]

We're going to be stating the same obvious problem until we're blue in the face.

They want a callout for themselves, specifically, regardless of interpretation or consequences, and many people have been at this for a while.

They seem to ignore it and give thumbs down to anyone with an articulate reason why catering to their desire to inject the language is unreasonable.

It's just going in circles.

"they" who is "they " ? me ? cause i am not a "they/them" (at least not now) i am he/him aka a guy

[COD3HUNT3R]

If everyone adds their inclusion word in readme Github would be https://change.org. I don't see any reason to feel excluded. Just contribute if you have time or ignore.

[COD3HUNT3R]

Btw there is good chunk of people suffer with ADHD and other mental problems in tech due to work pressure. If you feel this is making your life harder take professional help. People will not change for you, you have to make yourself stronger. You can not expect everyone to treat you better even with all the rules, laws and code of conducts. Wokeness is not a real solution.

[xgui4]

. Wokeness is not a real solution.

Where do you see the "wokeness" in my posts ?? i dont see it... i am not woke

[Ryu945]

Trying to make excessively long list of groups is usually done in Woke politics. I think he was was trying to say it gives a woke feeling when you keep adding groups to the list.

[xgui4]

i didnt even make a bigger list than the initial one, it is just one word.

[SuperDuperDeou]

You have 3 PRs, and they're all about trying to add the word "neorudivergent" into the readme, in a way or another, despite community pushback. No wonder if people start questioning you and your motives.

If you feel discriminated unless the thing you identify as is explicitly called out by name, then the issue resides entirely within your mindset. My heartfelt advice is to touch some grass, talk with real people, do things with your hands out in the real world, and come back to the internet when your head has cooled a little.

[xgui4]

why are so angry and against my attempt of trying to make the readme.md more sensitive-friendly and more inclusive (not a fake implicit inclusion)

This idea was rejected several times: X11Libre/xserver#302 (comment)

Please don't take it personally, and consider focusing on something else more constructive.

People may appear angry (that's not the case here though) if you keep trying to push the same idea again and again, even when other contributors ask you politely to stop.

but that the thing, Your way of communication was not neurodiversity-friendy and insensitive and i just wanted to remove my fear of ableism (which is a real thing) by being mention in the readme. and even hostile/ableist, that some of you response was 😭

[johnlettman]

i just wanted to remove my fear of ableism (which is a real thing) by being mention in the readme.

Why are the replies that essentially boil down to "'anyone is welcome' include what you're concerned about" insufficient?

They repeatedly set the tone that you are welcome. Furthermore, they were made by at least two individuals (incl. me) who fall under the same umbrella.

[alexislefebvre]

but that the thing, Your way of communication was not neurodiversity-friendy and insensitive and i just wanted to remove my fear of ableism (which is a real thing) by being mention in the readme. and even hostile/ableist, that some of you response was 😭

I'm not sure who are you speaking to. If it's me, please share links to the content you found hostile, so that I can review it and update it if needed.

[xgui4]

but that the thing, Your way of communication was not neurodiversity-friendy and insensitive and i just wanted to remove my fear of ableism (which is a real thing) by being mention in the readme. and even hostile/ableist, that some of you response was 😭

I'm not sure who are you speaking to. If it's me, please share links to the content you found hostile, so that I can review it and update it if needed.

no one specially but most of the reply that imply troll, that are insensitive, ablesit (like the word troll or leftist or "woke") in the #302

[xgui4]

i just wanted to remove my fear of ableism (which is a real thing) by being mention in the readme.

Why are the replies that essentially boil down to "'anyone is welcome' include what you're concerned about" insufficient?

They repeatedly set the tone that you are welcome. Furthermore, they were made by at least two individuals (incl. me) who fall under the same umbrella.

_"'anyone is welcome' mean pure merit and i have a hard time beliving pure merit without equity of welcome is fair and not ablesit

[callmetango]

@xgui4 I reviewed your pull requests and read all the comments related to them. In short:

You created the pull request Improving Inclusivity for Neurodiversity by updating the README by xgui4 · Pull Request #220 · X11Libre/xserver to add a neurodivergent and so it's a true inclusive!. People provided their feedback and the discussion went back and forth, but was based on opinions and arguments. Some of them well-founded, well-formulated, comprehensible and welcoming, at least in my opinion. Most of the commenters said that they are against the proposed changed. Then you closed the pull request in response to the feedback.

Later on you created another pull request [Documentation] Change the Readme.md to reflect the mission statement better (Issue #68) by xgui4 · Pull Request #302 · X11Libre/xserver. You quite expanded your additions of the previous pull request by e.g. the following:

We explicitly welcome those who are neurodivergent (e.g. autistic, ADHD, etc.) and understand that inclusion means more than just allowing access — it means providing equity of opportunity, recognizing that some contributors face unique barriers in open source spaces.

This was not met with enthusiasm. Some people commented more harshly than before. Their reasoning was that they felt annoyed of yet another approach when they already said "no". Their style was sometimes not very polite but to be expected and I think this can be resolved at eye level between people.

In general:

I understand that the topic "Neurodiversity" is important to you but this project is simply not about it. It is about bringing X forward. This is clearly stated in the README:

Anybody who's interested in bringing X forward is welcome.

If this makes you feel excluded, we don't have much choice but to agree to disagree. I will close the above mentioned pull requests for the given reasons.

Please see the above responses too.