[https://nvbugs/5769890][fix] enable system memory to transfer active message in NIXL ucx (cherry-pick from NVIDIA#10602) (NVIDIA#10914)

Signed-off-by: Chuang Zhu <111838961+chuangz0@users.noreply.github.com>
Signed-off-by: Yuxian Qiu <142763828+yuxianq@users.noreply.github.com>
Signed-off-by: Wangshanshan <30051912+dominicshanshan@users.noreply.github.com>

Author: yuxianq