fix: stop noisy logging about phantom shards that do not belong to node (#26536)

Stop noisy logging about phantom shards that do not belong to the
current node by checking the shard ownership before logging about the
phantom shard. Note that only the logging was inaccurate. This did not
accidentally remove shards from the metadata that weren't really phantom
shards due to checks in `DropShardMetaRef` implementations.

Cherry-picked from master-1.x and then conflicts resolved.

closes: #26534
(cherry picked from commit 8ef2aca)

Author: gwossum