refactor: optimize resources with gossip subsampling, memory leak fixes, and tuned constants

[lklynet]

please test and let me know your results. I think these are the best tuned settings we've had yet.

[owennewo-dev]

Crazy improvement. Here are my test results, I took these metrics after the server had been running for about 5 minutes.

Before
CPU, 1%~8%
Memory, 300~400 MB *it just kept climbing!*
Network, 2~66 Mbps *peaked to 50-60 Mbps a couple times*

After
CPU, 1%~8%
Memory,  90~160 MB *mostly hovering around 100 MB*
Network, 0.4~18 Mbps *peaked at 18 Mbps - mostly stayed at 0.4-3 Mbps*

Nice work, I will be able to run it 24/7 now haha