Fix torchao deps

[metascroy]

This PR

• Renames EXECUTORCH_BUILD_TORCHAO to EXECUTORCH_BUILD_KERNELS_TORCHAO to be more in line with other kernel options (e.g., EXECUTORCH_BUILD_KERNELS_OPTIMIZED)
• Fixes torchao lowbit kernel dependencies in xcframeworks
• Adds torchao lowbit kernels to the swift package

[pytorch-bot]

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❌ 6 New Failures

As of commit 8653c0f with merge base 010b800 ():

NEW FAILURES - The following jobs have failed:

• Apple / build-demo-ios / macos-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command bash /Users/runner/work/_temp/exec_script failed with exit code 65
• Build documentation / build (buck2) / Build doc (gh)
  At least one of the pre-conditions you specified did not hold
• pull / test-vulkan-models-linux / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t 5c278f1ffa94c3e3e6203662d57f00ed88608c84437f159c10ba52375441932d /exec failed with exit code 1
• trunk / test-models-arm-zephyr (add) / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t 4739a66bc87a0f89363f8d85c33211ca3ba2c8bffb831e43ca09ef5dd9dc44ab /exec failed with exit code 1
• trunk / test-models-arm-zephyr (mv2) / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t c016972ce5a22e23b5cae41ce76ffaacf840d5ed50791fc085fe3741d7f5d8be /exec failed with exit code 1
• trunk / test-models-arm-zephyr (softmax) / linux-job (gh)
  RuntimeError: Command docker exec -t fc72631b50e60f8652d060ebc7a7ce580dd98c8080863d3de7a5db5de8ff9125 /exec failed with exit code 1

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[metascroy]

@shoumikhin can I get review on the swift changes here + xcframework changes?